Welcome to the fourth week of the program!
As before – this is an overview of what’s coming up for the week and explains how the various tools for the week work.
Focus of Week Four’s Questions
The emphasis this week is on Disarm
You’ll be trying a different tool every day – so you just need to reflect on how that day’s tool worked for you
Tools for Week Four
Day 22 – Personify the Critic
Build or change from the work that you did in week 2 – name and draw a picture of the inner critic.
For example – Oprah Winfrey calls hers ‘the gremlin’.
For this day, when you realise the critic is speaking – remind yourself: ‘that’s X talking’
Day 23 – Create a Champion
Who would you like on your side to combat your inner critic? Who would kick their arse for being so horrible to you? Who is the person who’s the opposite to the critic’s voice – that reminds you of the great stuff you’ve done and the hard things you accomplished already?
Name and draw your inner champions
For this day, when you realise the critic is speaking – call on your champions to represent you and argue back against the critic.
Day 24 – Do Good, Feel Good
Pick at least one thing that will happen over the next day, where your critic would normally influence your response to hold you back.
Instead of acting based on that voice – do it the way you would if your inner champion was encouraging you; like your most confident self.
Day 25 – Three Perspectives
Pick three people whom you trust, and ask them to answer these three questions. Ping or email them with the below, and just reply with ‘Thank you’ – no further discussion. The message you’ll send is:
I think I may be a bit too hard on myself at times, and I’d like to work on quieting my ‘inner critic.’ I’d really appreciate your quick thoughts on the questions below – no need to spend more than a few minutes on them; just go with your first reaction. I won’t respond beyond a simple ‘Thank you’.
How hard do you think I am on myself?
How do you notice it shows up?
What do you think might change for me if I was kinder to myself?
Day 26 – Conscious Relaxing
Each time you notice the critic talking today – take a deep breath: in through the nose, and out through the mouth, consciously relaxing any muscles that have tensed up and focusing your attention on how you physically feel. Repeat three times, if possible – but just one is fine.
Day 27 – Critic’s log
Carry pen and paper with you everywhere today. Every time you notice the critic talking, make a note, adding whatever detail you can – it might be just a dash to show you noticed it; or you might have time to note what it was saying, how intense it was, and what triggered it.
That’s all – just note each criticism you’re conscious of throughout the day, as it happens.
At the end of day 27, when reflecting on your notes through the day, consider what you’ve learned from this close observation – eg, patterns, preceding thoughts, accuracy of the critic’s response.